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Post by Tabitha3319 on Mar 27, 2020 18:08:39 GMT -5
There is a balancing act to Ephesians 5 style submission for the wife.
You don't want to be disrespectful and disobedient. But you don't want to turn into a passive doormat either. Neither option is truly respectful and helpful--- which is the purpose of the wife status.
It can be difficult. Hubby came from a household of constant conflict. I came from a household where any parental conflict was out of sight. I grew to feel like peace was the norm and conflict should be avoided at all costs.
I'd like to take a moment to let people imagine the difficulty that could cause.
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Yes. You see the point.
I believe Jesus is the best example of submission for wives to follow. He obeyed God in everything perfectly, even to the point of death. However, He was not afraid to express His own desires, thoughts, and opinions. He asked the Lord to let this cup pass from him--- as in not go to the Cross!
A wife can fall into withholding her opinion and desires to try to avoid conflict but this only creates a false peace.
Some conflict is inevitable.
Proverbs says as iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. But that implies that they don't share the same views on everything.
The Father could have made His creation automatically obey like programmed robots. But that was not His will. He wants us to have our own will/desires and gladly submit them to Himself.
He doesn't actually want to take away our unique identities. But if we would only yield to the Lord, we'd discover our true selves.
But back to wifehood. Without the Holy Spirit, it is impossible to submit respectfully without becoming bitter or losing sight of your own self. Jesus had His own desires, and trusted Himself to the Father. Likewise, we wives are to have our own thoughts, opinions, and feelings to share. They bless and influence our husbands because they think a certain way and we think differently.
These perspectives compliment each other and by facing the fear of conflict, a lot of good can get done.
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Post by John on Mar 28, 2020 10:14:25 GMT -5
To me, the husbands should always try to be understanding of their wives feelings, and should always seek to find a solution that is reasonable to both of them. Only when all attempts at compromise are exhausted should he put his foot down and say, this is the way it is.
For the wives, they should be free to share their feelings and disagreements, but if their husband has made up his mind, ultimately, they need to respect it and obey him. I really think that if they are both trying, they will be able to come to a reasonable compromise in more than 90 percent of all situations.
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Cletus
Senior Member
Posts: 2,517
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Post by Cletus on Mar 28, 2020 10:39:40 GMT -5
To me, the husbands should always try to be understanding of their wives feelings, and should always seek to find a solution that is reasonable to both of them. Only when all attempts at compromise are exhausted should he put his foot down and say, this is the way it is.
For the wives, they should be free to share their feelings and disagreements, but if their husband has made up his mind, ultimately, they need to respect it and obey him. I really think that if they are both trying, they will be able to come to a reasonable compromise in more than 90 percent of all situations.
and as long as both parties do what you say here... God will defend that marriage. sometimes we forget marriage is not a two party covenant, its a three stranded cord. |
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Post by joseph on Jul 19, 2021 17:16:07 GMT -5
There is a balancing act to Ephesians 5 style submission for the wife. No, there's not.
Not in Scripture that is.
In the world, women have rebelled against God, constantly, and do not want His Way. They boldly proclaim that daily. They boldly verbally attack and oppose anyone who teaches God's Way.
This in no way is saying men have not rebelled as much or more. Neither is excused.
More clarity may not be possible at this point in time and thread yet, as some of the basic beliefs or thoughts presented in the op, or underlying this quoted portion, are like the roots, and
dealing with the leaves or the fruit is not helpful until the roots are healed/ corrected/ as God Accomplishes, as His Word Says and as He Permits.
Time , it very well may take time, even before addressing. Time in prayer for everyone reading. For everyone who is ekklesia involved.
Seriously, it may very well take many years before doing anything at all. Strange it may sound, but so many things have happened that way, over decades, when I thought it would only take a day or less. God's Timing is Absolutely and Completely Perfect in Every Way. Rest In Him. It Is Up To Him.
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Post by Tabitha3319 on Jul 19, 2021 18:22:49 GMT -5
There is a balancing act to Ephesians 5 style submission for the wife. No, there's not.
Not in Scripture that is.
In the world, women have rebelled against God, constantly, and do not want His Way. They boldly proclaim that daily. They boldly verbally attack and oppose anyone who teaches God's Way.
This in no way is saying men have not rebelled as much or more. Neither is excused.
More clarity may not be possible at this point in time and thread yet, as some of the basic beliefs or thoughts presented in the op, or underlying this quoted portion, are like the roots, and
dealing with the leaves or the fruit is not helpful until the roots are healed/ corrected/ as God Accomplishes, as His Word Says and as He Permits.
Time , it very well may take time, even before addressing. Time in prayer for everyone reading. For everyone who is ekklesia involved.
Seriously, it may very well take many years before doing anything at all. Strange it may sound, but so many things have happened that way, over decades, when I thought it would only take a day or less. God's Timing is Absolutely and Completely Perfect in Every Way. Rest In Him. It Is Up To Him.
When I say balancing act, I do not mean balancing God's ways with the ways of the world. I don't support rebellion of God's Word. |
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Post by John on Jul 19, 2021 19:21:16 GMT -5
There is a balancing act to Ephesians 5 style submission for the wife. No, there's not.
Not in Scripture that is.
In the world, women have rebelled against God, constantly, and do not want His Way. They boldly proclaim that daily. They boldly verbally attack and oppose anyone who teaches God's Way.
This in no way is saying men have not rebelled as much or more. Neither is excused. More clarity may not be possible at this point in time and thread yet, as some of the basic beliefs or thoughts presented in the op, or underlying this quoted portion, are like the roots, and
dealing with the leaves or the fruit is not helpful until the roots are healed/ corrected/ as God Accomplishes, as His Word Says and as He Permits. Time , it very well may take time, even before addressing. Time in prayer for everyone reading. For everyone who is ekklesia involved. Seriously, it may very well take many years before doing anything at all. Strange it may sound, but so many things have happened that way, over decades, when I thought it would only take a day or less. God's Timing is Absolutely and Completely Perfect in Every Way. Rest In Him. It Is Up To Him.
When it comes to the Bible's teachings on the roles of men and women, I hold to them 100 percent. You will find few people that will come against feminism harder than I will. To me, the entire movement is of the devil. It promotes rebellion against God's order.
As far as the OP in this thread goes, I did not take it that Tabitha was promoting rebellion, but was only saying that the wife should voice her concerns or opinions if she has a disagreement with her husband. She is his helpmeet, and she might see problems he does not. He would be wise to listen to his wife's opinion, but we know that ultimately the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. I am happy to see that you hold to the Biblical order in the home. Most today have compromised on such things for the sake of peace and unity. We need to stand up for what the Bible says in all areas.
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Post by joseph on Jul 20, 2021 15:29:35 GMT -5
When I say balancing act, I do not mean balancing God's ways with the ways of the world. I don't support rebellion of God's Word. What do you mean then to balance ?
What is there to balance ?
Can't we simply follow Jesus and obey Him as He Says, as He Shepherds us Perfectly with Perfect Care and Perfect Wisdom as God He Is ?
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Post by Tabitha3319 on Jul 20, 2021 16:49:50 GMT -5
When I say balancing act, I do not mean balancing God's ways with the ways of the world. I don't support rebellion of God's Word. What do you mean then to balance ?
What is there to balance ?
Can't we simply follow Jesus and obey Him as He Says, as He Shepherds us Perfectly with Perfect Care and Perfect Wisdom as God He Is ?
I try to follow the commands. There is a point where you have to do this in practice, not just as a concept. Like I said, its a balance between being too passive and not being submissive enough. When I say too passive, I mean never having an opinion or expressing myself to my husband. This does not help him, as he has said to me. Submission involves obedience but my husband prefers when I express myself and give my perspective, all while knowing he has the final decision. I hope that makes sense. |
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